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22-May-2011 06:30:49

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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You would put part of your name as head
because u always rep
what u can never get
Me and ur mom just met
she laid eyes on me and got a little wet
then I made her a bet
to see how low she could drop it
and that girl sure knows how to bop it.
It was a picture perfect moment
aint no need to crop it
so this rappin ur doing?
please stop it
ur only humiliating urself
I'd school u a lil more
but u clearly dont need any help
on looking stupid
cuz u do it pretty well.

22-May-2011 07:06:38

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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The snake is so slithery
and all the other animals
are always whispering
of how he viciously
and maliciously
attacked an innocent
The innocent was a rat
he had no forms of attack
so he couldn't fight back
the moral of the story?
Snakes are really gory
and they should be reported
because they pray on the weak
until they are deported

22-May-2011 18:09:55

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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Lady of Hope?
I say lady of dope
cuz she looks like a crackhead
always sniffin coke
She said hugs and kisses
X and O
I said never, no.
Just one more person
I have never told
its kinda cold
to judge someone
just because they're kinda old
but she's all wrinkly
I wear her costume for halloween
trick or treat
I hope we never meet
cuz u are gods defeat.

22-May-2011 22:39:46 - Last edited on 22-May-2011 22:40:04 by Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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Hey Snake, looks like I gotta diss you again.
I'm freestyling on a keyboard not a pen
ur girls only a 7 but I did her like she was a ten
and I got her on her praying knees, amen
but ur probably just a kid
so go back to ur playpen
and ur mom is pretty amazin
and no I aint playin
if im gettin too dirty for u
just say when

23-May-2011 01:20:08

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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Want a pint loves these
or does he really love me?
it's cause he's so loving
he takes after his mommy
cause she always call me
and we be talking
for like an hour
the clock's tick tocking
she asks me to come over
I get in my bugatti
but u just walking
she said 'oh, u saw me?'
I said, you wanna have a party
and now her pants are more populated than milwaukee!

25-May-2011 00:49:35

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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^haha, finally some competition. I've been goin easy on these noobs.
You call yourself Sabresire
well guess what, the stables are hirin
they need some more horses
and you are supplyin
I can tell that you arent tryin
and if you were, i'd be embarassed
I might even be cryin
or even dyin on the inside
but I am the Ish, so I need 2 ply
I saw your girl by the poolside
and she was staring at my like she was glasseyed
and she gave me a little A**ride
and when I spit this, I only halftried.

25-May-2011 02:02:12

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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You think you have already defeated me?
You havent even slightly depleted me.
Just remember every time you speak of me
that I am Gods Centerpiece
and that you spit slower than a centipede
you really think you can get the best of me?
well trust me, you dont want the rest of me.
I'm the instructor, so why are you testing me?
You really must think highly of yourself
but if this was the North Pole, im Santa Clause, you're the elf.
I spit like the devil, so I must live in hell
as I said earlier, I am god's creation, so I must've fell.
I spit fire, incase you couldn't tell.
I am like a 2-winged dragon without a tail.
So go back to your mommy, little girl.

25-May-2011 02:23:49 - Last edited on 25-May-2011 02:28:56 by Mr Advice

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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What about me? I cant believe you just asked that
I swear man, I really cant get past that..
well, I guess I gotta show you what im made of
and I aint talkin about shattered glass
you think you're better than me? a figment of your imagination
I dont wanna hurt your feelings, so i'll spare the humiliation
You really must not know who you're facin
because I got all the girls racin
and they aint even pacin
they are like a mob, tryin to get in
Just like I am God, now repent for your sins.
Or else I will take a gouge to both of your eyes
I'm letting you know now so you arent suprised
and one more thing.. we all know you're interested in guys.
I guess when Eminem said 'I'm cleaning out my closet' he was talking about you
I wouldn't keep you in there either, you smell worse than dog poo.
So please, just understand the simple fact
that you need to watch your act
when you are around me, or you will get slapped
not by me, by your own girl, the one that I tapped.
She doesnt like it when people hate on the King.
and if you dont believe me, look at her diamond ring
I gave it to her for her great pleasing.
and she's pretty good at wash rinse and repeating.

25-May-2011 02:38:13 - Last edited on 25-May-2011 02:38:32 by Mr Advice

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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You think I'm all talk and no game?
well I guess thats true, cuz I never get played
The only thing I ever get is payed.
and you will never get layed.
You're as cold as the winter
and no one likes you, like a blister.
talking about n4ked twister
But you didnt even maybe kiss her
so dont be talking lies
because that, no one likes.
all you're ever gonna do with your life
is ask, 'Would you like some fries?'
while I'm in a Tux and bowtie
I will be having such a good time
and you will ask 'cant I have mine?'
but the answer is no, you should've worked harder
but I'm workin hard, releasing albums better than 'The Carter'
If your girl had a baby, I was probably the father
and I wont let this hate go on any longer
so how about we become friends, because I kinda like your style
it's been a minute, maybe even a while
since i've seen someone with any skill to even last in a trial.

25-May-2011 03:15:56

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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Ice Cubess thinks his raw, but im gonna melt him
I really hope you're ready for this, cuz imma give u a beltin'
You sittin at home, you arent very wealthy
but im sittin on my throne, made of gold and velvet
Now please, dont make your little 6 line rhymes on my time
because your are just like a lime, you're rhymes are sour and you're lyrics are wack
so please, just fall back, so I can make my appearance
I have already gotten my flight clearance
so I am straight to the top, and you better fear me
because I am a monster when it comes to rap, and you might be weary
but trust me, once I rap about you, you will be tearing
because I rap like christmas paper
I flow like laddles
I'm harder than staples
all I need is a label.

25-May-2011 13:29:58

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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here we go again, same old thing
but I aint wearing the same old bling
this here, a four finger ring.
Like brass knuckles, i'll punch your face clean
So back up off me with all this hate
because i'll turn you bluer than the Thomas Train
I am on the road to the top, and naw I aint strayin
and I speak the truth, so I aint claiming
I never tell lies
so there's never anything to deny
so I will say this one more time
I am the Rap Cop, and you did the crime.

25-May-2011 22:34:01

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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The only reason I could possibly be numb
is because your lyrics are wack, and your flow is dumb
you couldnt even spit as good as I play video games with no thumbs
So go back to the slums that you came from, you lazy bum
because if you dont, i'll just throw u back on the garbage heap
Oh, it looks like your spit shine is tarnishing
I'll roast you like a pig and put an apple in your mouth for garnishing
this rap power I am harnessing
and I only use my powers for the greater good
but you're more rusty than Mater's hood.
If you arent already taking notes, you maybe should.
Wait, scratch the maybe, its a definitely
If I am the CEO, you arent even the secretary
and I will be the CEO, so you better Bless the Mary.
because you will always be secondary
and I am a leader, and my government is Totalitarian
because I bring Total annihilation

26-May-2011 01:46:04

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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Lady Zion, I rip you up into tiny Ions
I am high on life, letting you know so u dont ask what i'm on
I'm gonna make u feel like its that time of the month, get some Midol.
I can spit so well, I would dominate American Idol
I am so fresh, you might mistake me for Pinesol
You seen that Freddy Krueger?
Well he aint nothin compared to me
I will rip you up with my claws
I can make you scared to sleep
so please, dont come back
because I know you scared of me
Now, I aint really mean to be hating on you
I am just gettin my paper in twos
I aint talking about 2, but two hundreds
I stack so much green, I aint got room for the blues.
we all know you aint ever raking the grass
because you see me, and think it was your past
but I dont know why, cuz u never counted stacks
If im King Kong, you're just the hairy back.

26-May-2011 02:58:03 - Last edited on 26-May-2011 03:04:55 by Mr Advice

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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You think this is YOUR thread?
I dont know what got in your head
you might need to sleep a little longer, more bed
cuz you're obviously filled with endorphins
I dont know why you think you're the best, when im the one who got awarded
You think you got first place, but like I said, im the one who got rewarded
and I dont really like you, so I might get you deported
because you dont belong here, and y'd u bring more friends
Wow, I gotta go, but before you get all happy
I will slap you and your Mr. Slappy
Not really, thats kinda nasty
You're actually pretty chill, I'm cool with you
but dont think im getting sappy
because I am still a monster, like I mixed Mickey and Daffy

26-May-2011 03:33:05

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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Hey hi how you doing, your name is All Forlorn
but I own this rap game, now you're forewarned
I have told plenty of people this before
People walk in here acting high and mighty, but I'm the only Thor.
I dont want this to get messy, so please stop rapping, or this thread will get filled with gore.
Dont even make me start dissing on your momma
because I could crack more jokes than I eat chimichangas
and I spit way better than even a Llama
so please, go live on an island, on the the Bahamas
Maybe you could go to Haiti,
I hear you'd get all the ladies
and yes, I saw your avatar, I know you are one
but you never know in this world nowadays
I'm sure u got some surgery
and the doctor obviously didnt like how little he was paid

26-May-2011 13:30:03

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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Im sorry, did I ask you, Ice Wyrm?
It looks like u got a nice perm
how much did that cost you?
probably all the money you've ever earned
so dont come in here and dont even rap
because you have no idea how hard we work
If you hate rap so much
why click the thread?
you aint even worth fo' bucks
and if you wanna get in my face, you better back up
because you got that wack look
Now, I go more Ham then a pig
If rap is the patient, I can mend it better than Ludwig
are you tired?, cuz your mouth is always running
I'm truly askin, not trying to be funny
but it doesnt matter either way, because ive got way more money

26-May-2011 14:02:39

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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Wow, you're pretty funny, I guess you're the Joker
but I'm Batman, and I rip down the wanted posters
because I already got u locked up like ur Lindsey Lohan
did you get plastic surgery? Because you're clearly a Faux man
I blow up the beats like I'm a cannonball
and I rip on you like i'm Hanibal
so dont try and spit against me
unless you want me to cut your hands off
And your girls legs were like a slip n slide
when her P4nti3s dropped and her pants off
I know sign language, but this aint no hand talk
I got your girl in the pool, her racks enough
I got her playing pool, rack em up
The game is a football, and u think ur running it
but I can tackle em all
and they call me a beast, because I attack em all
and u think ur so big, but I've got blacker balls
That means it's pretty big, want a facial? I blast em all!

26-May-2011 22:48:09 - Last edited on 26-May-2011 22:48:31 by Mr Advice

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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Auz, i dont know why you spit the same thing over and over
I can do the same thing, see? For you, it's over
here I go, saying the same thing again, but dont worry, u might have writers block, but I can jump over
So I will use different rhymes now that I feel like gettin colder
because you are like toilet paper, but im as hard as a boulder
You think you're amazing, but I dust you off my shoulder
but just remember, if you want to get good, expand your vocabulary, and you'll learn as u get older
but In case you are already older, and in a Nursing Home
we know you're a girl, and now ur purse is stole
and this flow might be bad, but yours is worse tho

26-May-2011 22:57:49

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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I dont know what's up with Granite
he cut in line like we was fightin for food during a famine
I have a strong feeling he would, because he's the fattest
it almost seems like he planned it
Hey, another thing, why does everyone on here say word?
It's not even something real rappers say
and if you say it is, i dont know what you've heard.
and if you're the S*** then I am the Pooper Scooper
and every time I spit, you cant help but to say Damn, like you're the Hoover.
and people always rap about moms, but u aint even knew her
and yes, I must say you're flow is wack, doesn't the truth hurt?
Every time I hear the words 'greatest' a couple things come to mind
The first thing would be my amazing rhymes
next comes the flow and next lines
and if clocks cost, then I spent time

26-May-2011 23:03:32

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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I'd be your B**** if I'm roleplaying as your mom
because she is the one that made me a bologna and Parmesan
I am glad that you think you are the greatest
because I really love to drop the bombs
especially when people think they are better than me
and that's cuz everyone who says that is wrong
I will never be defeated or won over
I am a killer and this beat is the John Doe, er...
the Jane Doe, i think its a woman cuz I made it my B****
and my flows are infectious u caught the rap like u had a baseball mit

26-May-2011 23:09:26

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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Wow, I wonder how long it took you to come up with that
this is my house, and u tip toe like a pitter pat
You're the dog that eats my leftovers because I already finished that
You must really think that you are as tough as granite
It doesnt take Sherlock to see that im the one who commands it
I will never be cool with you, because you think you are a monster
but I am the one who already has a sponsor
and you wait, a few years ill be in concert
but where will you be? Sitting on your sofa?
Lookin so fat like u ate a hundred donuts
I smell so **** they make my own Aroma
I got a Bugatti, u just in a Tacoma

26-May-2011 23:35:05

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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This boy is rappin about Call of Duty
That's unheard of in rap, like modest nudity
and remember, its only the truth I speak
all my boys here are like a crew to me
at least Sabrsire and Arzee can be.
They're the only ones that have shown real talent
I smash on all yall like I got a meat mallet
You want to get in some beef?
Well I eat meat, you only eat salad
The only thing you can rap is Christmas presents
You think you are better than me? Of course I mind, like rune essence
That's a little runescape punchline, since we're in its presence
I dont understand why rappers touch their sack more than santa
I've got the question, do u got the ansuh?
I creep through the hedges like a Panthuh
In one quick leap I grab ya
now you can pick, torture chamber, or Slammuh?

27-May-2011 00:50:48

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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I dont know why you're calling me a kid, im not new to this world
because I am the one who makes it twirl
your raps are so nasty, they're so putrid I hurl
I just walked past this girl
I said dayyuuummm but didnt give her pearls
Cuz I know how to please a woman, and not with expensive gifts
thats why they all love me, and wanna get with this
I just killed this
and you are the witness
see this life you live?
I hope you are content with it
because it aint gettin better
unless you bow down to me
and aint no one clownin me
because I am no joke
I am drowning freaks

27-May-2011 01:46:31

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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As sabresire said, you get better over time
its not like I spit this good overnight
It takes alot of skill to tell a story
not all come out right
but this one might
because I am rapping from the heart
not from my mind
Just remember, practice makes perfect
and spit in your mind, even when you're workin
The only thing you should care about is your rhymin and your verses
and please, dont get caught up in the beef and the cursin
That is what makes a bad rapper worse
and the good ones eat dirt
like they are worms
but we are better than that
we can rise above the earth.

28-May-2011 00:09:04

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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Sabresire, I just lost all respect for you
Your line about Lord of the Rings
I found on another site, and now I KNOW im better than you
I mean, what were you instead to do
than copy someone else's lyrics
when people in here are ahead of you
I dont understand how you can sit there and copy
and then act really cocky
when you're biting others rhymes
Dont make up excuses cuz I know it's Bull sh1+aki

28-May-2011 08:41:40 - Last edited on 28-May-2011 08:42:09 by Mr Advice

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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I spit more fire than a 2 headed dragon
You're a horse, so lead my wagon
I cant believe you were braggin
I knew it was fishy, like it was salmon
You had opened a doorway to friendship
but that has long been slammin
so now go off and do your 'jammin'
because you dont belong here fa***t
My lyrics are better than yours
and I dont even have to steal them
I guess I get to reap the rewards
I got so much cyber-saliva
im spittin through this keyboard
My soul is free, but I havent seen yours
and I'm on the straight road to the top, no detours
But you? You will never make it
and I will forever say it
this is the game, and I am forever playin
I feel so amazin
when these flows I am creatin
I know are original
what about you? oh, wait, yours are stole
I bear it all when I spit, like a risque show

28-May-2011 09:16:51

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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I dont think you understand what I'm saying
I am the best there ever was, amazing
and all of you are complaining
well guess what, having haters is half of being famous
and imma bout to bust out so you might wanna put me in containment
Alright, look, I am the best MC
because all your raps are empty
but mine are filled up plenty
and believe me, im more handsome than Patrick Dempsy
and im lookin pretty $3*y
$3*y, im so s3><u4l
me and your girl get pretty sensual
she invited me into her vestibule
then there were more fireworks than a chinese festival
and you know what's best of all?
next time she sees you, she'll say 'best of luck'

28-May-2011 10:29:14 - Last edited on 28-May-2011 10:34:36 by Mr Advice

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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I dont know what you're on
Tztok-Flame aint raw
he's got less pause
than a dog
missing all his paws
and u just lost all your balls
Because you arent even trying to hate on him
You're parents must be proud, cuz they made a shim
and that is you, so get it in
with yourself, because u aint gettin any
except maybe Lettuce Head
and I was with your mom last night
she spread her legs
she said it was the word of the day
and we gotta spread the word
then I must say
I am the best you've ever heard
Wanna spar with me?
I doubt it, cause I go harder than the Carter 3
waynes album... it used to seem farther to me
but it's getting closer, because I am rising like gas prices
I'll give you more than the cold shoulder, ur a** is icy

28-May-2011 11:39:25

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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You're raps are getting better
but I just got a piece of advice
dont reuse letters
Like Ranga tang tang
it just doesnt go together
It's like Jeans and leather
It just doesnt look good
I was born in 1996 September
been rapping for a few months
but Im so good you'd think I've been doing this forever
I love when people dont understand me
I'm so good I can pickpocket hands free
when you notice ur swag is missing, you say 'it cant be'
but thats not what I took, because u didnt have any
You're like Steve Urkel
I killed this beat
I choked it out til it turned purple
And here I go, as Jaleel White
I'm so fly, and you cant even catch a flight.

28-May-2011 12:18:20 - Last edited on 28-May-2011 12:18:40 by Mr Advice

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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Alright, look, I got one thing to say
I can spit better than Granite any day
I know he wasnt the above poster
but I felt like I should get some closure
because everyone thinks his rap was pretty good
but his rhyming was sloppy and his lyrics were all over
but I walk the straight line like a soldier
Yeah, you're beats racing, and your hands are getting colder
I murdered this thread with my amazing talent
I rap harder than DJ Khaled
Like i said, I killed the beat
and my license to kill is valid
I am like the knight in shining armor
because I'm so valiant
Now where's the dragon at?
There's a picture on facebook
it's of a fake look
and u are tagged in that
because you are 100% fake
but I only do what I am bangin at
Please, dont rap on me again Granite
or I will have to send you off this planet
you dont belong here, and we understand
this is a fantasy for you, peter pan
but I am captain hook, to send you out of this fantasy land

28-May-2011 18:49:42 - Last edited on 28-May-2011 18:54:26 by Mr Advice

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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If you make a new page for the best
I will fill it up, so what about all the rest?
well, let's put their raps to the test
because they are just kids, but im an artist
I can flow like the cold wind
you must have more balls than the U.S. Open
because I am pretty provokin'
Like I said about that page of best raps
all of mine will be reposted
and I got your girl more wet than the ocean
and we was rubbin lotion
and I didnt even use a love potion
Just make a page dedicated to me
and I will get you educated for free
I salute to all the Marines
even the ones who never made it to the sea
and I am what you will never be
You say you get all the girls
but you're less straight then the letter 'C'

29-May-2011 01:12:19

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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Dude, Sabresire, dont lie to me dude. I found those 2 lines on that website bro, you totally stole them.
'If this is Lord of the Rings, you're the hobbit, im the wizard
I am colder than the Dairy Queen Blizzard'
You also stole
'You think you're so big but you're about to get cut down
Like Star Jones losing 200 pounds'
Dont lie to me man, I research you guys to see if you're stealing raps from other sites. I hate plagiarism.

30-May-2011 14:17:57

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30-May-2011 17:08:48

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30-May-2011 17:09:09

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30-May-2011 17:09:37

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30-May-2011 19:54:29

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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I dont think you have the right eyes to be looking at me
because you got them crooked teeth
so if you want me on topic
then please, just leave
Mind your own business
because you are no longer a witness
to these posts that have been diminished
into 'This post has been hidden'

Mods really get on my nerves
it's like they're run in a herd
trying to take down ASCII art
and want only words
even though ASCII takes skill
you stupid old bird
Dont take this rap seriously
except for the first part
because I think you deliberately
wanted this thread to smell like turd fart
that's why you posted with all your hate
because you cant create art.

^owned a mod.

30-May-2011 21:29:25 - Last edited on 30-May-2011 21:30:26 by Mr Advice

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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I understand why you named yourself dog face
I got the money drawn like a King and an Ace
and I aint talkin bout no card game
I rip the beat so bad it gets a fart stain
Please dont come here unless you spit
because I dont like people who quit
go off of what you got
and let the rest flow like Niagara
if rap is $3}{, I am the \/14gra
if you spit slow, at least try fasta'
because you look like a silly clown
now we're all filled with laughta'
Come on man, show me what you're made of
If this is the game, you play dumb
you're the math problem, I am the main Sum
I'm so fly, you cant even hitch a ride when the plane comes.

31-May-2011 23:09:20 - Last edited on 31-May-2011 23:10:36 by Mr Advice

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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If you want to get better, take my advice
spit with peppers, add spice
See, that rhyme wasn't bland
I got my own rappin' brand
it wasnt really planned
it was just like your moms b00bs
it fell in my hands
I'm playin the game, you'r cheering in the stands
I am proud you didnt spit on my name
because I have a feeling it would be lame
your spits are more tame
than a housecat that was maimed
with a vacuum by the maid

31-May-2011 23:50:01 - Last edited on 31-May-2011 23:50:34 by Mr Advice

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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Mmm... look at what a pint go
but im sharper than a pine cone
I shine more than a rhinestone
I am brighter than a light glow
School is finally coming to a close
this year I really cut it close
Its like they gave us homework overdose
teachers? I'm over those..
keep me posted though
on how it's goin ho
I'm glad its over, but imma miss the seniors
they just made my life a little more completer
they're so awesome, it doesnt even need words
I will be a junior next year
then im one year away from livin my life
chasin my dreams, and gettin it right
I will get a record deal with Young Money
and I will rep it bright

02-Jun-2011 00:28:48

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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I would rap on you but your name is a lot of nothing
maybe if your raps made sense you would be something
lets get to boxing, rolling up sleeves
tough knees
buff, lean
grunting
I will knock you out in one punch
and that aint dumb luck
this is just fun stuff
when I rap on scrub nuts
As I said earlier, your name is gibberish
Mortal Kombat, let's finish this
You lookin kinda shady, tinted lens
you might wanna sew your career back together... stitchin win

02-Jun-2011 20:09:00

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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I take it beef is your main export?
I dont want any rap feuds in here
yes, I know, you're jealous cause I will be endorsed
My babe will look like a Girl Next Door
I'm on my way to the top, you aint even on the tenth floor
you must sh** fire and ur ass is hot, cuz u keep the bench warm
Unless you want me to light you up like a million firecrackers
I'd back off, cuz I think your raps are so dumb i'm filled with tired laughter
The game was looking for a hitman, and I am its hired master.
You think you're gonna make it to the top? Nah... cuz im climbin faster
You will never make it, just admit defeat
I play the game so hard, but I wear deodorant
your pits? they stink
The jersey fits on me
so they put me in
now im with the big leagues

03-Jun-2011 01:52:41

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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Please dont steal my rhymes and put in different starters
I just got someone for being in the game, while they should grab some bench
Come on, honestly, tell me who you think you're in charge of
You weren't any good, even from the start up
You look low on batteries... you might wanna get a charge up
I rap more on this thread than 2 of you... partners
Me and Dwayne Michael Carter
We will tear up the world like its the beginning of rapture
I got so many stacks, but I aint a purse snatcher
Got this game in the bag... Captured
Hey batter batter... but I bat first.
You wish you could rhyme half as well
I spit like a demon, but I'm not going back to hell
Eyes are stuck to me like Hair Gel.
I will be a bigger star then Denzel.

03-Jun-2011 16:02:27

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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You think you're the God of War, but you aint no Ares
If your raps are your troops, your army isnt scary
if you write on paper, you might wanna get to tearing
because something of that caliber only belongs to a fairy
I get more cheese like I'm dairy.
You think you're tough, but you aint nothin special
I am the only one here with some potential
I show up at all times, im unscheduled
If you wanna get better, I can teach you the fundamentals
oh, whats that? you're mad my rhymes r more orig'nal?
Well, I dont think that's coincidental
It takes skill to rap harder than metal.

04-Jun-2011 08:12:08

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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Hello there, how's it goin KaoticMemory?
I'm about to drain all your energy.
You wont be able to move any faster than a centipede
when you hear me rap, I'll be your enemy.
You'll see me in your sleep, even when you're awake
Make one wrong move around me, that'll be your last mistake
My rhythm is amazing, my lyrics are insane
I am always a step ahead of you
Like you're morning and i'm midday
Can I ask a favor? Don't be hating on women,
even though they're made for the kitchen
How do I get my food? I got 3 women
Call it lavish Livin'

05-Jun-2011 15:09:18

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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Want A Pint, we understand you have no friends
Just try and get new ones, or make old amends.
There's no need to stand here and pretend
like you're up here with me as one of the best.
You're looking up like all the rest
to see me, King Kong, bangin on my chest.
You know who you could call my twin? Superman
I hold back when I spit against you newbies, like the Hoover Dam.
The money is my ocean and the green is my sand.
Dont cross the line, just see where I stand.
My rhymes are so insane, like a Keeper of Mans
It'll make you completely pee in your pants.
Dont get it twisted, I'm just keeping it Legit.
Looks to me like you could use a workout; WiiFit.
They girls are the Queso, and I go back for 3 dips.
Sippin drink wine, they'll give me free sips.
Dont gotta pay for nothin, cuz im the sh**

06-Jun-2011 15:32:02

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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Alright, here we go again, yes I changed my name
Y'all havent even passed Go,
yet you're tryin to play the game
I get comps, yall pay for chains
What's to come is a road, and i'm layin bricks 1 at a time,
but your whole future's paved.
When you hear me spit, you sit on the edge
even though your whole seat is payed
I dont know what to spit about now
so I will freestyle random facts
if you're the king I spit on the crown.
I chill with my knights, we sit all around
That was a King Arthur joke, do you get it now?
I dont think you understand what's happening half the time.
Looking into space with blank eyes
You sit there staring off at Space Guys.
Grab some bench, Coach calls 'take time'
You just spit the same rhyme
but I mix it up, like a g4y guy.
Not in the se><ual way, but I live dangerously
I am your role model, you wanna be the same as me.
Here comes the railroad, I am the train to be.

07-Jun-2011 17:24:55

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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You may be the queen
but I am the king
and we aren't married, so please just leave.
You could make me a meat and cheese
while your gone, make sure it aint on wheat.
I like my white bread, I dont like greens.
So dont humiliate yourself further
I would insult your more, but thats just mean.

07-Jun-2011 17:39:19

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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Okay, now I will rap like I promised.
I must be Al Qaeda, because my raps are bombin'.
When I am on the mic, you better stop talkin
Or I will put a Red Sock in it, Boston.
I spit like somethin straight outta Compton
You aboutta get rap drunk, like I spit tonic.
You're feelings are broken... want a splint?
Riddler riddler, where is the hint?
You hail from England, but you aint a prince.
Now I got one more question... Fish and Chips?

07-Jun-2011 23:38:42

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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I dont know what you just said, but I'll try to clear it up.
I may not be the best, but trust, I am feared enough.
I spit like I ate a jalapeno, now are you tearing up?
Like a well oiled machine, but your gears are rust
Ridin in on my horse, now clear the dust
You can rap against me, but I will tear you down.
Dont act like a King when I wear the crown
I cant fill your shoes? Cuz you're a big clown...
I am the best rapper around
now tell me... Is it clear now?

07-Jun-2011 23:50:15

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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You want it hard and fast? That sounds kinda strange...
Fine.. You're my next target at the Firin' Range.
You want a battle? State the Time n' Day
Okay, what im really trynna' say
Is that you honestly have no chance.
You're creepier than Steve Urkel in Pants
My raps put you in a trance
Now time for you to do a Monkey Dance
You're crossed the line... Maybe a couple strands
Dont do it again, or you will understand
what it means to be Under Land
Because you will be six feet under
and that aint no blunder
I only speak the truth
You wanna rumble? Well you just met Thunder.

08-Jun-2011 00:06:57

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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It is really fun, like the above user stated
I just broke my clock, so I dont got time for haters
Arrows are old school, I shoot Cupid Lasers
You fall into the background, like you shootin faders.
But i'm like Tony Parker, with that Housewife, but no Desperation.
Hands behind your back, we're headed to the station.
Officer, whatd I do? I was only playin..
You're gettin locked up for constant hatin
But please sir, It was an honest mistake
I dont wanna hear it, tell that to your fellow inmates

09-Jun-2011 18:33:55

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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Writers block has stopped me in my tracks
but its time to fire right back
Can't you do the math?
You Want a Pint, but u aint even gettin half
It's back to drinking from the tap.
Just follow my lyrics like a map
I draw a picture with my lyrics, so I must spit paint
Your raps were rentals and your payment? It's late.
2 girls at 1 time? Call that a twin date.
We committed more than there are sins made.
Yawnin the next mornin, time for a clean slate.
It is time for this to come to a conclusion
Sittin in a yacht, all boozin
Michael Jordan, tall shoes, and
Ball hoopin'
Cops shootin
Dog's chewin
That's how the hood is, rough groupin.

14-Jun-2011 21:18:38 - Last edited on 14-Jun-2011 21:19:27 by Mr Advice

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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I'll match your rap to a Tee, and a golfball.
I'm Tiger Woods, but I aint on call
when I spit all u hear is raw talk
when you spit all I hear is pond rocks.
Dont come up in here acting you're the greatest
when your previous raps were the fakes*.
You copied from some nameless.
and then you claimed it.
You're raps are now forever tainted
you wont be respected, and you cant change it.
I always hit homers when there's loaded bases.
My face is on plaques
because I spit facts
in my raps
that you couldnt match
I'm too fast
it's like Deadliest Catch.

15-Jun-2011 04:03:38

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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Hey, BadgerGod, lay off Want a Pint
it's not his fault he cant lay a simple line.
My breath smells like lemons, my teeth shine
I have a body like a god, that's 3 signs
that you are the wrong man for this
You all jelly cuz ur raps aint mine.
But then again, at the same time
you try and hate on me
saying you aint tryin
We all know you are, and it's still horrible
I'm still trying to find a foe that's formidable
your raps suck more than a wh0r3 in a hole
My raps drain your energy, and you drop like a beat on a drum
I walk up to your body, in one hand is a gun
I pop you in the head, then cut off your thumb
knock on your door, and feed it to your mum.
I aint british, but it rhymed, and now im done.

18-Jun-2011 19:38:01

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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I dont understand your name... Raw GTO?
I partied with your girlfriend in all see-through clothes
You never run the race, cuz you're off, speed's too slow.
This dis is needless though.
I'll drown you like New Orleans, the Sea's too low.
I am the King, I reign my Kingdom, like Regal Snow.
I rule with an Iron Fist, I aint evil, though.
Dont come on this thread, as Ive said to many before
Packed with bombs, 3 or more.
I'll blow your mind, like it's full of C4
I'll mop the ground with you, clean floors.
You're a psychopath, but I took the detour.
I am a God of Rap, to always be reborn.

19-Jun-2011 05:18:49

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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Andre, we're not gonna rate it, you copied half of it from Lil Wayne's Verse in Look At Me Now, silly noob.

Edit:
No one is posting... >.> And Bon Jovi, I wouldn't be calling rap stupid when you cant even spell 'truly' right. Rap actually takes a large vocabulary and the ability to think quickly. Two things you clearly don't have. The fact of the matter is, most rappers are very intelligent.

20-Jun-2011 23:03:32 - Last edited on 21-Jun-2011 19:20:10 by Mr Advice

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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Imma cut you down like oak trees
F*** the po-lice
Ho please
I got her down on both knees
I got so much ice im riding cold skis
People try and stand up to me, but I knock em down
I kidnapped the game, to never be found
You could search around
in every town
Maybe even do some soul-searchin
but u gotta get dusted off like old curtains
life is a gamble, but im the deala'
I came out, guns blazing, what urs concealed fa'
I sit sippin on some tequila
Im sittin on my Fortune like da Wheela'
now go home, becuz dont nobody fear ya

27-Jun-2011 03:00:21

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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wow.. I havent posted here in a while.. hold up. Lemma drop dat beat. C-c-c-cuuufff yo chiick! haha, DJ Ill Will, baby! DJ Rockstar!
alright guys, since I havent posted in a while, I feel like I gotta reclaim this thread, cuz im da king.. here it goes, boys.
I feel like Wayne, my mind full of metaphors
I aint the kinda guy that u just settle for
I make the women crazy, like they live in a mental ward
Young Money Army, and I am part of the rebel core
If you dont mean what you say, then what u said it for?
my lyrics are from the heart, yours are from the rental store
I tell ya, one of these darn days
ill b at the top, above the stars gaze
countin fat stacks, cuz every lard pays
but right now, thats a far place
They say every kid has his dark phase
But I skewered mine
becuz my futures bright
its just suits n ties
but yalls a buncha squares like some Cuban guys
You got saved by the bell
cuz i wouldve raised higher hell
I struck down Zeus, you could say lightning fell
when im rish, ill pay clientele
from my man-made entire wealth.
I will create my own fortune
To the richest from the poorest
your fancy toys and adorable adornments
But my eyes are open to whats really important.

Alright guys, holla back at me, we c how u b kickin.

02-Jul-2011 08:55:06

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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alright.. uhh.. ya.. drop dat beat.. holla at ya boy...

Travelin' the world like I'm a conquistador
I'm unlike anything you've ever seen before
raisin the bar, and you 10 feet to short
too many rhymes for just 1 man, so let me do yours.
You're on cloud 9, im all the way in Jupiter
I can raise high hell just like im Lucifer
Ya better catch ya girl, cuz ya losin' her.
Play the game like it's Monopoly
steady buyin out all the property
am I above the law? cuz no one on top of me
spittin stories in my raps like im Socrates
Not a sitting car, but im your newest idol
My raps stop people from being suicidal
Insert age-old proverb here, cue the bible
So fly im on the next plane, you a new arrival
My words are the stranger offering candy, you're the clueless child.
Code red, call in dispatch
telling on-lookers to get back
victim was the beat, murderer was this kids raps
Yes, I confess, im tryin to do my best, to admit I killed it
They took a needle and filled it
up to the brim til they spilled it
Death Penalty, but I still lived
Batman, Superman, Ironman, call em all
but im invincible, I'll drop em all
and just to top it off
I never dropped the ball

Uhhhh... haha, holdin it down for mah boi Want a Pint, holla at me

04-Jul-2011 18:54:14 - Last edited on 04-Jul-2011 18:55:07 by Mr Advice

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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Lord Ninjah, have a little patience
no need to bump, no one's on vacation
You think you're magic like Houdini, but this time there's no escapin'
lock me up in da slammer, cuz this beat is what im slayin'
I killed it 10 times over, 2 life sentences
my raps get you high, like over-the-counter medicines
I can smell you coming from a mile away, cuz your odor is redolent
girls always gaze at me, like im the fifth tour stop
red lasers pointed at you, now you've got four dots
I see why you're always on your guard, like Fort Knox

uhhh...

31-Jul-2011 08:28:04

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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I admit, you've got good flow, but you aint nothin' without that
you've got bad style, like a fat guy in a mickey mouse hat
and you always jumpin on my $]-[!t like a Kangaroo in the outback
You look like a kinda lopsided Steve Erwin
after that stingray gave him a hurtin'
Look out, I'm on fire! Now your computers burnin!
Go back to your slum-dog backwoods apartment
2 wives and 50 children, all of them are starvin'
Me and Wayne kickin it on Mars, just like Marvin
Who is dat? Oh damn... the Looney Toons Martian!
I'm killin it Cartoon Style, Roger Rabbit
Reachin' for the stars, I have gotta grab it
keep it locked on my channel, its just your force of habit
Now.. this might all make sense in your future
Keep the smartin' up to Martin... Luther
It's time for this rap to close.. suture.

31-Jul-2011 08:59:25

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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No one's scared of you, you couldn't hurt a fly
I aint Buzz Lightyear, but I reach for the sky
It seems your cockiness has gotten you 2 notches too high
Time for me to drop you down like Mario jumping on a Shy Guy.
You have no punchlines, but mine are plentiful
I look down on you like a parent when the child doesn't eat their vegetables
Rap isn't for you... maybe Grocery Bagging is a little more sensible
Poppin' caps, aimin' down the sights, and got you in my reticle.
You don't agree I'm the best? You're overcome with jealousy
You're a \/!rg!n for life, forget about celibacy
my ears block out bull$]-[!t so I dont understand what you're tellin to me
I just burned yo ass to a hellish degree

01-Aug-2011 02:49:38

Mr Advice

Mr Advice

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I still cant hear you, your voice is fadin'
I'm always in first place, it aint even worth racin'
just remember, haters are half of being famous
My face is on billboards, but you're still nameless
Keepin' on my grind, I'm so ill
don't ever spread rumors, I speak fuh real
money spillin' out my jeans, can't keep it concealed
In one palm, a crystal ball, you on the other hand
Are basic cable, I am On-Demand
got more cheese than the moon before the Lunar Land
You bite my flows like its a Fat Cake
I shoo you off, you make dat sad face
Rollin' green in your weave, call dat $]-[!t half-baked
I dont understand your thought process
think you're better than me makes me nauseous
Latino Caliente, I love those spicy sauces
I killed this beat, six-feet under in its coffin

01-Aug-2011 03:43:23

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